My story PTII
PT2
Since her wedding last August, I continued to do a few weddings in the fall and in winter. I completed another semester of college, as well. College had made me miserable. The work stressed me out, I never enjoyed it. The only time I enjoyed “teaching” was when I was teaching and helping out with my Church’s youth group. Over Christmas break, I took more pictures of my favorite model: my sister. I began to joke about taking the semester off and pursuing my photography business. It truly was a joke. No one expected me, a dedicated student who graduated high school early and was on track to graduate college early to drop out of college.
As Christmas break was coming to an end, I was slipping back into my depression again. I would wake up in the middle of the night with a panic attack at the thought of classes starting back up. I began to wonder if I was truly meant to be a math teacher. Helping out with youth fulfilled my dream of being a teacher and I could barely help with youth once college started back up. I decided I was going to take the semester off. None of my family members believed me… until I told them I had withdrawn from all of my classes.
Since January of 2021, all of my time has been devoted to my photography business. My mental health has increased more than I thought it needed to. I now see pictures and videos of me in college and see just how miserable I was. My photography has been expanding. I have been booking weddings and couple sessions like I always wanted to. My plan was always to get my teaching degree, try out photography, then if that failed I would go back to teaching. But, with all the COVID craziness, why not flip my whole life plan upside down? Why not chase my dreams? I am such an advocate for dream chasing for other people, so why wasn’t I chasing my OWN dream? Well, I am now. It’s amazing, terrifying, and completely unexplainable. This is truly the biggest leap of faith I have ever taken. Sometimes life is unexplainable and crazy. Sometimes God has other plans. Sometimes those side passions are the true gift that He has given you. And He wants me to use it. So, I am.